What is a RAD Sib?
A neuro-typical brother or sister of a child with RAD
Why they need your support
RAD Sibs are hurting. They are on the front lines of the RAD battle, witnessing the destructive behaviors threatening their family. While everyone is caught up with the needs of their sibling, they are left to cope with the chaos and meet their needs themselves. RAD Sibs often feel pushed aside and suffer in silence- wanting to avoid causing more “problems” for their parents.
Many RAD Sibs also suffer trauma at the hands of the traumatized sibling with RAD. They may, along with their parents, show signs of PTSD.
Parents of RAD Sibs
If you’re a RAD parent, recognize the reality that your non-RAD child needs support. See beyond the “I’m fine” facade and don’t assume everything is okay. If you are at your limit and simply can’t provide that support right now, find others who can. Reach out to friends, professionals, and family members.
- Spend one-on-one time doing something they enjoy
- Check in routinely and practice the H·E·A·R method
- Look for signs of PTSD and get them [and you] professional help, if needed
Family and Friends
Extended family and friends can help by providing judgement-free support to the parents. Make yourself available to spend time with the child or teen without their high-needs sibling. Small actions and gestures of support can go a very long way for both the RAD Sib and their parents.
- Spend one-on-one time doing something they enjoy
- Invite them with you on activities or trips
- Attend their special events and/or offer transportation
H·E·A·R them
Have time set aside
Have time set aside to talk with your child. This may seem impossible when you also have a child with RAD, but try to make it a priority. You and your child will feel better when you take time to connect.
Empty the room
Make sure the child with RAD is not near and cannot sabotage your conversation. Find a quiet and private place to talk where your non-RAD child feels comfortable. Put aside devices and distractions and give them your undivided attention.
Actively listen
Your child may not open up right away. When they do, you may find some of what they say difficult to hear. Validate what they are feeling and don't interrupt or try to solve their problems right away. Focus on building trust and connection.
Repeat
Make this a recurring event! The more you H·E·A·R, the easier it gets. Keeping regular check-ins will help build a stronger relationship and improve communication. It will also empower the neurotypical child to come to you as new issues arise or as old traumas bubble to the surface.
suggested videos
Others Like You
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Two young adults open up about life as RAD Sibs.
Sage's Story
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Sage shares what it’s like living with siblings with RAD.
Crystal's Story
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Crystal shares the challenges she’s faced and what is helping her heal.
Addie's Story
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Addie and her mom, Lauren, share their story of living with a child with RAD.
Johnny's Story
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Johnny, a sibling of RAD, offers encouragement to other siblings and families.
Trauma Bond
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Preventing trauma bonds from forming between RAD and neurotypical children in the home.
Processing Emotions
RAD Sibs Spotlight
Helping neurotypical people process their emotions about their sibling with RAD.
Glass Children
Alicia Arenas, TEDx
Often seen-through, Glass Children are siblings of children with special needs, including RAD.
Transition From Home
RAD Sibs Spotlight
How to talk with your neurotypical child about their sibling with RAD leaving the home.
Therapies for RAD Sibs with PTSD
For more information, click below.
suggested reading
Articles and Blog Posts
- Siblings Under StressOpens in a new tab
- What Are the Effects of a RAD Child on Their Siblings?Opens in a new tab
- What it's Like Being the Sibling of a Child with RADOpens in a new tab
Are You or Your Child, a RAD Sib?
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The information on this site is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition.